In the voices of Bonnie (B), Cooper (C), Cisco (Ci), Dusty (D), Hanky (H), Fawn (F), and the Chickens (Ch):
(B) Hey Cooper, guess what I heard Mommy say to one of her friends?
(C) What, Bonnie?
(B) She said all the animals here are trained.
(C) Oh yeah?
(B) What’s that mean?
(C) It means she thinks we all do what she tells us to do.
(B) Well, that’s silly. Let’s ask them. (People don’t know it, but we can talk to other animals in our minds, and we don’t have to be right there.)
(B) Hey Dusty, Mom says she’s got you trained. What do you say?
(D) Trained? Ha. Yeah, I do what she asks, most of the time. But it’s on my say-so. And I make sure she knows she’s not the boss. Don’t ask Cisco though – he’s a wussy people pleaser.
(Ci) Hey, what’s wrong with that? Mom just wants us to have manners. Stand nicely for the foot trimmer, tooth fixer, and doctor. She calls that being a “good citizen,” whatever that means.
(D) There’s nothing wrong with showing you’re the boss, you know.
(Ci) But I love pleasing Mom. She gives treats and hugs me.
(D) Ugh. It’s bad enough when she grooms us. Just do enough to get the mud off, that’s good enough.
(Ci) Well, I like looking handsome. And doing tricks for her, just the way she wants them.
(D) Heh, a couple times is good enough. We’re not in the circus, you know. It doesn’t have to be perfect.
(Ci) I know. But I love pleasing Mom. I’ll do it however she wants.
(D) Snort.
(Ci) Besides, when we do what she asks, we get more treats.
(D) I suppose.
(Ci) So Bonnie, yes, we’re trained.
(B) Hmm, what do you think, Hanky?
(H) Well, I’m a bottle baby, so I grew up with people and I love them. I try to do what they say.
(F) Well, I’m not. I’m pretty independent. But if I do what Mom asks, I get treats. So yeah, I try when it makes sense. Sometimes it just doesn’t.
(H) Yeah, like why should we come back in when the foot fixer or doctor are here? They just poke and prod us and cut our hooves. That doesn’t do us any good.
(F) Yeah, so maybe we’re semi-trained. (Giggles.)
(B) And what do you chickens think?
(Ch) Well, we don’t think much. But we do know to stand back from the door when Mom comes in or out.
(Ch) We aren’t trained when it comes to going to bed though. We love running back and forth from coop to coop.
(B) But I heard Mom say you won’t go in the “wrong” coop, so maybe that’s trained?
(Ch) Maybe…
(B) Then she said she has us trained. Us! Can you believe it?
(C) Ha, I think we have her trained instead. We make sure she gets up at 4AM if that alarm doesn’t go off, so she feeds us by 4:15. Then we make sure she gets up from her nap at 8AM so she doesn’t miss our next meal. And of course, she has to be ready for Snacky Time at 6PM.
(B) She says she taught you “down” to get off the counter.
(C) Well, that’s just to give her more room to fix our food and treats.
(B) Oh and don’t forget – I have her trained to pick me up and take me to the kitchen for food so I don’t have to walk. All I have to do is be on the bed, stand up, and do a somersault, and she’s putty in my paws. She loves to kiss me and my belly, and I like that too.
(B) And I have her trained to feed me every time I go in the kitchen.
(C) Yes, she says Oscar trained you to take 1, 2, or no bites most of the time, then eat good when she gets frustrated.
(B) And she says we come to bed when called most of the time. But how many times has she come out and brought us in herself? More steps saved!
(C) And if we’re a little naughty, we just have to give her that look, and she melts in our little paws.
(B) She did train us to let her cut our claws.
(C) Well, who fights spa day? Just don’t let her give us a bath.
(B) We’ve trained her to allow us on the counters, chairs, cabinets, bed. And we have our very own couch. But she thinks that’s her idea.
(C) But we couldn’t ask for a better Mom.
(B) Mommy saved my life!
(C) And she thinks it’s wonderful how bonded we are.
(B) So we’ll let her think she’s got everyone trained. The outside animals may have fallen into that trap… but not us!
My Fresh Food Secret
I used to think vacuum sealing was just a fancy gimmick to make people spend money. Ziploc bags are cheaper, right? Squeeze out the air, and you’re good. Or so I thought.
But other farmers swore by it for meats and goods, and even grocery stores use it. No matter how hard I squeezed those Ziplocs, freezer burn, mold, or plain deterioration always crept in. I hate wasting food – or money – and I won’t risk getting sick from iffy borderline stuff.
Last year, I took the plunge with a middle-of-the-line sealer: user-friendly, no crazy bells and whistles, just my guinea pig trial. Like my small engine winterizing routine keeps the Kubota humming through snow season, this one’s a quiet game-changer. Now? I love it!
Meats last way longer with zero freezer burn. Cheese stays fresh in the fridge without molding. Even my dried herbs taste like harvest day months later.
Vacuum sealing saves cash by slashing waste and locks in freshness and nutrition like it promises. My freezer’s happier, and so’s my wallet. Ziplocs? Rarely touch ’em now!
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Product Spotlight!
My Fresko vacuum sealer and bags – highly recommended!
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This post is intended for informational purposes only. All information provided does not constitute veterinary medical advice and should not be used as a replacement for professional veterinary consultation. I am not a veterinarian or any other medical professional. Please consult your veterinarian regarding any change in treatment or supplementation for your companion animal.
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